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4 Reasons Why INFJs Have Very Hard Lives

1. They Feel Misunderstood

Feeling misunderstood can be a challenging experience for anyone, but it can be particularly difficult for those with the INFJ personality type. INFJs are known for their complex inner worlds and their unique perspectives on life, which can make it challenging for others to fully understand them.

One of the reasons why INFJs often feel misunderstood is that they tend to be very private individuals. They may have deep thoughts and emotions that they keep to themselves, which can make it difficult for others to get to know them on a deeper level.

INFJs may also struggle to express themselves verbally, which can further complicate communication with others. Another reason why INFJs may feel misunderstood is that they have a strong sense of idealism and a desire to make the world a better place. They may have values and beliefs that differ from those of the people around them, which can lead to conflict and misunderstandings.

In addition, INFJs may feel misunderstood by others because they have a unique way of processing information. They tend to be intuitive and may make decisions based on gut feelings rather than logic. This can be difficult for others to understand, particularly those who rely on concrete evidence and data to make decisions.

Feeling misunderstood can be a lonely and isolating experience, but there are ways for INFJs to cope. One approach is to seek out like-minded individuals who share their values and beliefs. INFJs may also benefit from finding creative outlets, such as writing or art, that allow them to express themselves in a way that feels authentic and meaningful.

Ultimately, feeling misunderstood is a common experience for INFJs and is something that they will likely encounter throughout their lives. By embracing their unique perspectives and finding ways to connect with others who appreciate them, INFJs can learn to navigate this challenge and live fulfilling lives.

2. They overthink all the time

Overthinking is a common challenge for INFJs, and it can lead to a range of negative emotions and behaviors. Overthinking involves dwelling on past events or worrying excessively about the future, often to the point where it interferes with one's ability to enjoy the present moment.

One of the reasons why INFJs tend to overthink things is that they have a rich inner world. They are introspective individuals who enjoy exploring their thoughts and feelings, and they often take a deep and contemplative approach to life. While this can be a strength in many ways, it can also lead to overthinking and rumination.

Overthinking can lead to a range of negative emotions, including anxiety, stress, and depression. When INFJs get stuck in a cycle of rumination, they may struggle to let go of negative thoughts and emotions. This can lead to a sense of being trapped or stuck, which can further exacerbate feelings of anxiety and depression.

In addition, overthinking can interfere with decision-making. INFJs may spend so much time analyzing and weighing the pros and cons of a decision that they become paralyzed and unable to take action. This can be frustrating for both the INFJ and those around them who are affected by their indecision.

One way to cope with overthinking is to practice mindfulness. Mindfulness involves focusing on the present moment and accepting thoughts and emotions as they come, without judgment or rumination. By learning to be more present and aware, INFJs can reduce the impact of overthinking on their lives. Another approach is to challenge negative thoughts and beliefs.

When INFJs catch themselves engaging in negative self-talk or ruminating on past events, they can ask themselves whether these thoughts are helpful or accurate. By questioning their own assumptions and beliefs, INFJs can develop a more balanced and realistic perspective on their lives.

Ultimately, overthinking is a common challenge for INFJs, but it is something that can be overcome with practice and self-awareness. By learning to be more present, challenging negative thoughts, and seeking support when needed, INFJs can live more fulfilling and balanced lives.

3. They are idealistic individuals

Idealism is a prominent characteristic of the INFJ personality type, and it refers to the belief that one can make the world a better place by pursuing high ideals and living according to one's values. INFJs have a strong sense of empathy and compassion for others, and they often feel called to help those in need or to work towards a greater good.

One of the challenges of idealism is that it can be difficult to reconcile one's high ideals with the realities of the world. INFJs may feel frustrated or disillusioned when they encounter injustice or inequality, and they may struggle to find a way to make a meaningful difference in the world.

They may also feel overwhelmed by the scope of the problems they see around them and struggle to find a sense of purpose or direction. Despite these challenges, idealism can be a powerful motivator for INFJs. Their strong sense of purpose and commitment to their values can inspire them to take action and work towards positive change.

They may be drawn to careers in fields like social work, non-profit management, or activism, where they can use their talents and passions to make a difference in the world. One way to cope with the challenges of idealism is to focus on the small, tangible actions one can take to make a difference.

INFJs may find that they are more effective when they focus on specific issues or causes, rather than trying to change the world all at once. They may also benefit from seeking out like-minded individuals or joining a community of activists or advocates who share their values and beliefs.

Another approach is to cultivate a sense of resilience and self-care. Idealism can be emotionally taxing, and INFJs may need to take time to recharge and care for themselves in order to stay motivated and effective. This may involve activities like meditation, journaling, or spending time in nature.

Ultimately, idealism is a defining trait of the INFJ personality type, and it can be a source of both inspiration and challenge. By finding ways to balance their ideals with the realities of the world, and by cultivating a sense of resilience and self-care, INFJs can work towards positive change while staying true to their values and passions.

4. They have extremely high expectations

High expectations are another common challenge for INFJs. As idealistic individuals, INFJs often have a strong sense of what they believe is right and wrong, and they may hold themselves and others to very high standards.

While this can be a strength in many ways, it can also lead to feelings of disappointment, frustration, and even guilt. INFJs may set high expectations for themselves in areas like personal growth, career success, and relationships.

They may strive for perfection in their work or personal lives, and may become easily frustrated or upset when things don't go as planned. They may also struggle with self-doubt or imposter syndrome, feeling as though they are not living up to their own expectations or the expectations of others.

One of the challenges of high expectations is that they can be difficult to meet. INFJs may become overwhelmed or stressed when they feel that they are not living up to their own standards, which can lead to a range of negative emotions and behaviors.

They may also struggle to accept imperfection in themselves or others, which can lead to strained relationships and a sense of isolation or loneliness. One way to cope with high expectations is to cultivate self-compassion. This involves treating oneself with the same kindness, caring, and understanding that one would offer to a close friend.

By learning to be more gentle and forgiving with oneself, INFJs can reduce the impact of high expectations on their lives and develop a more balanced perspective on their strengths and weaknesses. Another approach is to set more realistic goals and expectations.

INFJs may benefit from breaking down larger goals into smaller, more manageable steps, and focusing on progress rather than perfection. They may also benefit from seeking out support or guidance from others, whether through therapy, mentorship, or a supportive community.

Ultimately, high expectations can be a double-edged sword for INFJs. While they can motivate and inspire growth, they can also lead to feelings of stress, anxiety, and self-doubt. By learning to cultivate self-compassion and setting more realistic goals and expectations, INFJs can find a greater sense of balance and fulfillment in their lives.